Tuesday, October 19, 2010


Love This Pain got rec'd!  

Yes, it's true.  Love This Pain was rec'd by a lovely blog, 'Misfics' - dedicated to secondary characters (Team Seth!) and non canon fics.  While LTP is a feeble attempt at canon, most will argue that it's not.  *coughTwilightedcough*

A big THANK YOU to this lovely site for giving my little Seth fic -that - could some love.  I'm so touched, and this made my day.  Be sure to head over there and check out some of their wonderful other fic recs - spread the love.  

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Leah Clearwater 2.0

So, I must say that one of my favorite characters is Leah.  If you're reading my fic 'Immortal' I haven't gotten to Leah yet, but the level of torment and agony that girl goes through in Eclipse (albiet behind the scenes in a sense) must have been monumental.  Can you really blame her for being how she is in Breaking Dawn?  (aka, a heinous bitch 90 percent of the time?)  I really can't.  While I'd love to write a Leah fic, I'm just not sure that I have that much angst in me.   I'll have to leave it to the other authors out there to write a Leah fic.  

That said, I've come up with a compromise by inserting a healthy dose of Seth Clearwater's love sister into Love This Pain.  However, she isn't the Leah that we're all used to.  I give you...

Happy Leah.  

The girl has been through enough, so I wanted to give her a dose of peace.  While I know right off the bat I will get comments about her being out of character, I'm choosing to ignore them.  

First of all, people change and most importantly - grow.  While my Leah has continued to occasionally phase (as we will learn) after meeting her much younger boyfriend Scotty, I do believe that separating herself from a pack and from La Push would have helped her do this.  Why you ask?  Well, she hints at wanting to relocate and get the f*ck out of La Push in BD, I had to give her her wish.  

Besides...Regan and Seth will have enough angst for one story, lol.  I needed to have a strong female come in that is relate able to Regan.  Claire is her friend, but Claire is too perfect.  She's never had her heart stomped on, she's never gotten in trouble, etc.  Claire is too squeaky clean to relate to Regan on the level that Leah will.  Regan has hit rock bottom since arriving in La Push, and the one person who will be able to relate to that is my version of Leah.  

That said, prepare yourself to a different girl than we saw in Eclipse and Breaking Dawn.  I think that getting away from Sam and Emily and the pack and moving to Seattle would have been the absolute best thing for this poor girl, so that's what I've done.  This is a Leah who has gotten up, scraped her heart off the floor, and distanced herself from all sources of pain and strife that have been plaguing her.  She curls her hair.  She wears high heeled boots.  She laughs.  She smiles.  Get used to happy Leah. 

Care for a teaser?


I knew when Leah stepped off the plane, because Sue shrieked with joy and clasped her hands together; I had also seen her high school pictures hanging in the upstairs hallway.  However, the girl that stepped off the tiny plane and into the airport doors was not the same girl that I had seen in the pictures scattered around Sue’s house.  No, that girl was sullen.  She had short, jaggedly cut black hair, a thin, almost slightly sallow looking face in the pictures; that Leah looked serious, almost…disappointed and brooding.  Her dark brown eyes had reminded me of Seth’s, but hers were quiet and flat, not happy and sparkling like his.  However, that had been the girl in the pictures.  

The woman that breezed through the airport doors wasn’t anything like the sullen looking teenager I had seen.  

Her long, lean legs carried her across the distance between us with such grace that it reminded me of the way Alice Cullen had moved; it was like you could have hurled a dozen tennis balls at both of them and they would have gracefully avoided both of them without spilling their coffee.   Leah moved like that.  She wore high heeled boots, dark, straight jeans, and a fuzzy white sweater that hung off her coppery shoulder.  A belt was cinched snugly around her waist, showing off her trim figure and long, gazelle like body.  The white color made her beautiful skin glow such a beautiful color that it almost hurt to look at her it was so perfect.  Her face was rounder; fuller, but it looked healthier than the pictures of her.  Leah’s cheeks were a bright pink from the icy wind that blew outside the doors, but as soon as she was inside it didn’t even look like she had noticed the rain.  Her black hair was longer now; it hung down past her shoulders in a sleek cut, certain pieces around her face curled in a stylish way.  

Leah was absolutely gorgeous.  

“Mom,” she breathed, embracing sue.  She had to lean down to hug her, and even Charlie.  Seth was next, embracing his sister tightly.  Leah looked small only next to Seth; she had to be almost six feet tall, not even counting the boots.  He thumped her on the back as he hugged her, but she didn’t seem to mind as she squeezed him back.  

“Hi little brother,” she said, beaming at him.  Happiness radiated from her as she pulled away and followed Seth’s’ somewhat expectant gaze…to me. 


Saturday, October 9, 2010

What do you get when.....

What do you get when you send two hormonally driven, lust-filled virgin imprints to Isle Esme?  Jake and Renesmee go cliff-diving one day on Isle Esme at the waterfalls.  When Renesmee tests Jacob's resolve with relentless flirting, teasing, and a super skimpy bathing suit (thanks, Alice), Jacob admits he is about to lose his mind...


“Go to the cave,” he called over the roaring sound of the waterfall.  She nodded, hiking along the ridge of rocks that led to a little alcove behind the waterfall.  It was a low ceilinged little indentation in the rocks, carved out by the water.  It went back about ten feet, and had a shallow tide pool and flat rocks to sit on. 

She looked around, taking in the appearance of the caves.  They had been there only a few short years ago, but it still felt like eons since she had been there last. 

Jacob’s voice startled her.  “You know, we used to have tea parties back here,” he said, a smile dancing on his lips.  She turned around, smiling wryly at him.

“Sorry,” she offered. 

“I didn’t say I minded.  If you were having fun so was I.”

She was silent for a few moments, and time seemed to drag as they stood there, Jacob crouching slightly in the low ceilinged cave.  She pressed her lips together, listening to the sound of the water hitting the lagoon in front of them. 

“That was fun,” she said finally, motioning to the lagoon where they had just dove.  “We should dive again. “

He nodded, looking slightly disappointed.  Swallowing her fear, she moved past him, brushing dangerously close to his body as she slid past the narrow rocks, teasing him.  She could feel him suck in a breath as her bathing suit clad bottom brushed against the front of his swimming trunks, but she kept moving.  They easily climbed up the rock face of the cliff in silence, finally reaching the top after a few minutes of climbing. 

Once there, she turned to look at him as she adjusted her swimsuit.  Her plan had worked at least a little – he could barely take his eyes off of her in it. 

Her eyes met his with a satisfied stare when she caught him watching her, but he simply looked away.  She followed his gaze as he stared out over the tree tops to the ocean, the waves crashing against the white beach far below. 

“Let’s go,” she said, motioning him forward.  He moved toward her, and she stuck out her chest again as she arranged her hair in preparation to dive.  Suddenly, his hot hands were on her sides and she felt herself being catapulted off the rock face.  She hit the water below a second before he did, and this time when they surfaced she barely had time to breath before his lips were on hers. 

Renesmee sputtered for a second, surprised at the shock of falling from such a height and then being assaulted by Jacob’s lips…not that she was complaining.

His mouth moved against hers hungrily, and she felt her arms wrap around his neck as they bobbed in the water.  She jumped slightly as her body bumped against the rocks; she realized that he had floated them over to the side of the lagoon, not that she would notice anyway.  Her head was spinning as he continued to give her deep, needing, open mouthed kisses.  It was an attack at the very least, but a welcome one.  She shivered as her back was pressed up against a flat rock, Jacob pinning her against it. 

Renesmee gasped slightly as his mouth made its way to her cheek, then to her neck, then down to lightly scrape his teeth against her ear.  

“You’ve been teasing me,” he said, his voice gruff.  She looked at him sideways, fighting the urge to smile. 

“What’s your point?”

“You’re going to make me do bad things, Renesmee.”

“So it did work then?”

“You make me so crazy sometimes… that I want to…”

She didn’t wait to hear his response.  “So do it then,” she countered back, sucking in a ragged breath as she felt her hands start to shake.  A rumble sounded deep in his chest, and his eyes seemed to darken before the words were out of her mouth. 

“You mean it?”

She nodded.  “Of course I do.”

Jacob stayed there, frozen against the rocks; their bodies pressed up against each other in the cool water of the lagoon, the waterfall crashing down behind them. 

He pressed his body flush with hers, and she became temporarily tongue tied; her previous boisterousness and daring mouth had frozen, slightly agape as she watched him.  The need to be suddenly careful hung in the air; she had never seen him look as wild as he did now; his jet black shaggy hair hung down the sides of his dark face, clinging to his defined jaw.  His eyes were blacker than the deepest, darkest night and suddenly alive with such fire that it made her want to whimper slightly.


Her voice seemed to startle him out of his daze, and he jumped slightly.  He suddenly pushed his body away from the rocks, floating backwards into the misty water.  Renesmee bit her lip and watched him move away from her, his coppery muscles flexing as he swam away from her. 

“Jake,” she repeated, pushing off the rocks.  She swam after him, her coppery hair fanning out behind her in the water as she moved.  He moved so that he was behind the waterfall, out of her sight.  Jacob was up out of the water, sitting on a flat rock at the water’s edge.  His knees where drawn up to his chest, his head resting on his arms, appearing to be deep in thought. 

With a grunt she hoisted herself up out of the water, crawling across the rock to sit cross legged a few feet from him. 

They were silent again, and it began to eat at her.  This wasn’t how she wanted things to be at all.

“What’s wrong?”

He lifted his head, glancing over at her.  His dark eyes were back to normal now, the fire and wildness gone.  He opened his mouth to say something, but seemed to think better of it and didn’t.

“Tell me,” she insisted, her timid void echoing off the nearby rocks.  He didn’t’ meet her gaze.

“You’re making me crazy.”

She snorted to herself, biting back a sarcastic laugh.  She was making him crazy?  Try the other way around…

“Speak for yourself.”

“What?” he asked, lifting his head up off his arms. 

She shook her head, dropping her eyes to the rocky surface below her. Her fingertips moved absently over the smooth rocks in the cave behind the waterfall, focusing on anything but his eyes.  If he caught her at the right moment, she knew that one look from those eyes would make her say anything he wanted her to.

“Nevermind.  Why am I making you crazy?”

“You just are.  I…I can’t explain it.”

“That’s insulting.  I’m making you crazy and you can’t even say why?”

“No.  You just are.”

“So don’t make me make you go crazy.”

He lifted one eyebrow skeptically.  “Easy for you to say.  You…you don’t know how un-hinged you make me, Renesmee.”

“I have an idea,” she muttered, feeling the rocks again.  She looked back up at him, narrowing her gaze.  When she saw the worried look in his features, her frown instantly lightened.